June has come and gone, along with my attempts to become a better man. I completed some of the 30 challenges with great enthusiasm (ex. days 1, 7, 12), found I had tackled some on my own initiative in the recent past (ex. days 6, 13, 19), deemed myself exempt from others (ex. days 4, 11, 30), and was utterly confounded by a few (ex. days 3, 21, 26).
The main insight that this experience afforded was that it takes a lot of effort to be a good and, over time, a better person. This may seem a somewhat obvious point, but I realized that I often give way to the belief that some people are just more naturally good than others. I'm not talking about the idea, usually born of modesty, that others are better - stronger, braver, more gracious and patient - than we are. I'm talking about the paradigm that these traits are innate to some, so that those outside of "the elect" are excused from exhibiting these virtues and, worse yet, relieved of trying to attain them.
It takes substantial and conscious effort to navigate the push-and-pull's of life, to strike the balance between labor and rest, gentleness and firmness, patience and gumption, frugality and generosity, hanging on and letting go... the mere thought of getting it all right makes me want to quit on the spot. But nobody wakes up one day and becomes a responsible, mature adult who balances family, work, spiritual and physical obligations with ease and aplomb. No one in my acquaintance - including people who I admire and respect the most - even comes close to that description. Those who try, however, are better for the effort; quite often, the world is also better for it.
A better man (or person), therefore, is one who tries and strives to be better than his or her current self. For there is always room for improvement and no one is exempt from the effort.
